but i make it look fun

i paralyze myself too easily.
i don't know what that says about me. but i sit and stare and drown in the amount of things i need to do, and if they're manageable then i can just start the first one and start checking them off the list that i always have running, written or unwritten. if they're not manageable, as they often aren't, i sit paralyzed, unable to even begin because if i won't get them done, why even start and subject myself to the inevitable hours of stress? but i can't even blow them off and enjoy the self-induced free time. it's too guilt-ridden. so i sit and stare and drown.

don't be busy like me.