so...what a crazy day. awesome, but crazy. and kinda weird. i woke up at 7:30 to get ready for auditions at 10:00- i wanted to be semi-warmed up (or just awake) by the time auditions started. they didn't take nearly as long as i thought they might, and i regretted having never taken a tap class in my life. oh well, we'll find out about the shows soon enough, and if i don't get cast/hired, i can go to jamaica and creation and the outer banks and possibly take the full time babysitting job i was offered (which would pay more than the theatre company...). i win either way- it's in god's hands. then i danced with this amazing little girl in the big service tonight. it's so wonderful to do what you were born doing and bring glory to christ with it. i can't even explain the feeling...just go try it. figure out what you love to do, way deep down, what you were made for, and say "god, this one's for you" and mean it. after we danced i ran across the parking lot to the youth building and led worship....it was one of those times where i'm like "god i can't do this on my own- anything i would say would be completely worthless...speak through me." so i was praying and was all fired up anyway from being able to dance and sing for jesus in the same day, and i mentioned some things out of the blue that ended up completely having to do with cliff's message that he gave. it was so cool. all i can say is: god is awesome.
...however, high school is not. this was the not-so-amazing and enjoyable part of the day. for the youth service we watched this video about teens always trying to fit in and the way the world looks at us and the way god wants us to be with others. they had some interviews with some kids, and one of the boys was kinda chubby and they had a clip of him like dropping his lunch box in the cafeteria and he was telling the interviewer that he just never felt like he fit in anywhere and no one liked him or would talk to him....and he didn't really know why. some of the boys were chuckling at him and being like "cuz he's fat" and stuff...oh my gosh i could have freaked out. i just sat there and cried...call me emotional or sentimantal or whatever- but there are so many hurting people that gather in buildings every day from 8 to 3 with hundreds of people who ridicule them, but deep down feel the same way about themselves, and it makes me sick- because no one tries to change it! how many teens are in the U.S. now? millions. hundreds of millions. and how many of us are christians? probably a bigger number than most would think- we're so good at hiding it. "you're the best kept secret in my generation...and i've found you out." let's start a revolution! just CARE about people. go talk to people who are alone. how can we call ourselves followers of jesus christ if we don't do what he tells us or try to act like him...aka loving people despite how "comfortable" we feel while we're doing it. who says serving christ is comfortable? do you think we can affect people and tell them about the amazing freedom and love of having a personal relationship with the creator of the universe by sitting back and thinking "they'll get it on their own...somebody else will tell them....someone else will pick up their books...somebody else will go talk to that boy sitting alone at lunch...someone else will be friends with that pregnant girl...somebody else will make them feel wlecome at youth group..." who will? all the "somebody elses" are thinking the same thing! GET UP, and DO IT. step out. jesus did- and look at all the amazing things that happened. people were getting saved by the thousands every day. and someday we'll get to see those people in heaven. wouldn't you like to know that that overweight lonely boy in your homeroom will spend eternity knowing he's loved by jesus rather than sitting in hell with satan because no one here did what god was screaming in our ears, and thought he was important enough to be told about christ. even if it won't be fun...or easy...or people will think you're weird...or you will lose the 'popularity' you've been working so hard to get. or...i'll do it later. i'll talk to them next week, when i'm not so busy. when i'm not so tired. when i don't have so much homework. when there aren't so many people around. guess what- you don't have all the time in the world. how would you feel if that boy or girl was in a car accident on the way home from school that day? you missed your chance. and so did so many other people....who waited for "someone else" to do it. that's why we're still here. jesus could come back for us right now...but he LOVES us all! he doesn't want to leave anyone behind, but since he gave us freewill, it's up to us to accept him. and the world is so screwed up now that it's so hard to find the truth, so he's given us the job of bringing the people to him through their own freewill- he won't make us. or them. but he knows how hopeless it seems right now, so he's giving us more time to tell more people about him. and what are we doing with our time? worrying about homework? worrying about having enough money to buy the clothes we want to wear? getting all worked up about what so and so thinks of us? giving ourselves pity parties for our own little problems? and i'm not accusing....i'm listing some of my own faults. but something tells me that i'm not the only one struggling with this...because the world isn't exactly getting any better. especially young people. and not because we're horrible people, but just because, saved or not, we're lied to every single day about what matters and how we should spend our time and about faith. get past the lies. don't listen to a world that tells you that you should do whatever feels right for you and you should focus on all of your own problems and expect everyone else to do the same....has it worked so far? swim against the current, find some people who can help you keep swimming, and start caring about OTHER PEOPLE. work hard now, so that we can all celebrate together FOREVER in heaven, in the presence of the god who loves us more than we can ever know, and living perfect worry-free lives. we don't deserve that any more than anyone else. so why are we keeping it a secret?
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